Maddy the Doula Lady

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady Healing After Cesarean: Your Week-by-Week Recovery Guide You just had major abdominal surgery AND became responsible for a tiny human. Let's talk about what recovery actually looks like — physically, emotionally, and everything in between. Here's something nobody tells you: cesarean recovery doesn't get nearly enough respect. Society treats C-sections like they're the "easy way out" (they're not). People expect you to bounce back quickly because you "didn't really give birth" (you absolutely did). And somehow you're supposed to heal from surgery while also keeping a newborn alive on zero sleep. Let me be clear: a cesarean birth is BIRTH. It's also major surgery. Both things are true. And your recovery deserves real attention, real support, and real information about what's coming. So let's walk through this together — week by week, body and mind. The First 24-48 Hour...

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady Epidurals Explained: Everything You Need to Make Your Choice Epidural or no epidural? It's one of the biggest decisions on every pregnant person's mind. Let's cut through the noise, bust some myths, and give you the real information you need to make YOUR choice. I've been at births where moms planned an epidural from the first contraction. I've been at births where moms swore they'd go unmedicated and changed their minds at 7 centimeters. I've been at births where moms labored without any pain medication and felt like warriors. You know what all those births had in common? They all ended with a mom holding her baby. There's no trophy for suffering through labor. There's also no shame in wanting pain relief. What matters is that YOU get to make an informed decision about YOUR body and YOUR birth. So let's talk about epidurals — what they actually are, what they actually do, and what you ...

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady What to Expect When You're Induced: A Doula's Honest Guide So your provider mentioned induction. Maybe you're scheduled already, or maybe you're just trying to understand what it actually involves. Either way — let's walk through this together, step by step. I'll be straight with you: induction wasn't what I imagined before I started attending births. I thought it was simple — show up, get some medicine, have a baby by dinner. Then I became a labor and delivery nurse. Then a doula. And I learned that induction is its own kind of birth experience — one that comes with its own timeline, its own challenges, and its own opportunities. If you're facing an induction, you deserve to know what's actually coming. Not the sugarcoated version. Not the horror story version. The real, practical, this-is-what-happens version. Let's get into it. First Things First: Why Are You Being Induced? Inducti...

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady Why Your Birth Story Matters More Than You Think You'll tell your birth story for the rest of your life. At birthday parties, to curious friends, maybe even to your grandchildren someday. It matters — not just what happened, but how you felt living through it. Here's something I want you to know: ten, twenty, thirty years from now, you will remember the day your baby was born in vivid detail. The smell of the room. The sound of the monitor. The voice of the nurse who held your hand — or the one who didn't. The moment you realized this was really happening. The first time you heard your baby cry. These memories don't fade. They become part of you. So why does it feel like everyone wants to rush past the story and skip straight to "but you have a healthy baby, right?" Let's Talk About That Phrase "Healthy mom, healthy baby." You've heard it a million times. And look — yes, of course...

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady What Families Experiencing Loss Actually Need If someone you love has experienced pregnancy or infant loss, you want to help. But you don't know what to say. You're afraid of making it worse. This is for you. When a family loses a baby — whether through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death — the people around them usually want to help. But they don't know how. So they say nothing. Or they say the wrong thing. Or they disappear entirely. I've sat with hundreds of grieving families. I've heard what they actually needed versus what they got. Here's what I've learned. What They DON'T Need Please Don't Say These Things "Everything happens for a reason." — There is no reason good enough for a baby to die. This minimizes their pain. "At least you can try again." — This baby was not replaceable. Another pregnancy doesn't erase this loss. "At least it was early...

From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady Is Bereavement Doula Work Right for You? Not everyone is called to this work. And that's okay. But if you're reading this, something is pulling you toward it. Let's figure out if it's the right path for you. I get asked all the time: "How do you do this work? How do you sit with families in the worst moments of their lives and not fall apart?" The honest answer? Sometimes I do fall apart. Just not in front of them. And I've learned how to put myself back together. But this work isn't for everyone. And there's no shame in that. Let me help you figure out if bereavement doula work is calling you — or if your gifts might be better used somewhere else. This Work Might Be for You If... Signs You're Called to This You're comfortable with silence. Not awkward silence — sacred silence. You can sit with someone who's sobbing without rushing to fill the space with words. You don...