Endometriosis Awareness Month | From the Desk of Maddy the Doula Lady
When Pain Isn't "Just Your Period": What Every Woman Should Know About Endometriosis
She was 15 when the pain started. Doubled over in class. Missing school every month. She told her doctor. She was told it was normal. She told another doctor. Same answer. It took 9 years — 9 years of pain, of being dismissed, of being told it was in her head — before she finally got an answer: endometriosis.
March is Endometriosis Awareness Month, and I want to talk about this condition that affects 1 in 10 women — yet so few of us have ever heard of it.
I want to talk about it because many of the families we serve at Mary's Hands Network have walked long, painful roads to pregnancy. Roads that included years of unexplained pain. Years of fertility struggles. Years of not being believed.
And when those families finally arrive at their birth, they're carrying all of that with them. Understanding endometriosis helps us understand them.
The Numbers Nobody Knows
Let those numbers sink in. One in ten women. That's your sister, your coworker, your best friend. And it takes an average of 7 to 11 years — sometimes longer — for them to get a diagnosis.
That's not months. That's years of suffering. Years of doctor visits. Years of being told nothing is wrong.
What Is Endometriosis?
Endometriosis is a chronic condition where tissue similar to the lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus — on the ovaries, fallopian tubes, the tissue lining the pelvis, and sometimes other organs.
This tissue behaves like endometrial tissue: it thickens, breaks down, and bleeds with each menstrual cycle. But because it has no way to exit the body, it becomes trapped. This leads to inflammation, scarring, and adhesions — bands of fibrous tissue that can cause organs to stick together.
Painful periods (dysmenorrhea): Pain that goes beyond typical cramping — severe enough to miss work or school
Pain during intercourse: Deep pain during or after sex
Pain with bowel movements or urination: Especially during your period
Heavy periods: Excessive bleeding or bleeding between periods
Infertility: Often the first sign that leads to diagnosis
Chronic pelvic pain: Not just during periods — ongoing pain in the pelvis
Fatigue, digestive issues, bloating: Often mistaken for other conditions like IBS
But here's the thing: symptoms vary widely. Some women with severe endometriosis have mild symptoms. Some women with minimal endometriosis have debilitating pain. The severity of the disease doesn't always match the severity of symptoms.
"It's Just a Bad Period" — The Dismissal Problem
This is where I get frustrated. And sad. And angry on behalf of every woman who's been dismissed.
Many women with endometriosis report being told by doctors that their pain is "just part of being a woman" or "normal period pain."
One of the biggest barriers to treatment is a lack of awareness that significant and chronic pelvic pain is NOT a normal part of menstruation.
Studies show that diagnostic delays are driven largely by physicians — specifically, by not recognizing symptoms as abnormal or not referring for appropriate testing.
Think about what it does to a person to be in severe pain and be told nothing is wrong. To be told they're exaggerating. To be told it's stress. To be told to take some ibuprofen and tough it out.
Many women begin to doubt themselves. They wonder if maybe they ARE being dramatic. They stop advocating for themselves. They suffer in silence.
Endometriosis and the Road to Motherhood
Endometriosis is one of the leading causes of infertility. Approximately 30-50% of women with endometriosis experience difficulty getting pregnant.
The reasons are complex: the inflammation and scarring can affect the ovaries, block fallopian tubes, and create an environment that makes it harder for embryos to implant. Some research suggests that endometriosis affects egg quality and the uterine lining's receptivity.
For women trying to conceive, endometriosis adds another layer of grief, frustration, and uncertainty to an already emotional journey.
Many undergo surgeries to remove endometriotic tissue before attempting pregnancy. Some go through multiple rounds of IVF. Some experience miscarriages — which are more common in women with endometriosis.
By the time they finally achieve pregnancy, they've often been through years of physical and emotional trauma. That doesn't disappear when the pregnancy test turns positive.
Women with endometriosis who become pregnant may also face higher rates of certain complications, including preterm birth and placental abnormalities. Their pregnancies are often considered higher-risk and monitored more closely.
Why This Matters for Birth Work
When a family comes to us for doula support, we don't just see the pregnancy. We see the whole person. The whole journey.
For families who've struggled with endometriosis and infertility, that journey is heavy. And they carry it into the birth room.
Asking about their path to pregnancy. "What was your journey to get here?" can open important conversations.
Understanding heightened anxiety. After years of things going wrong, it's hard to believe things will go right. That's not irrational — it's protective.
Believing what they tell us. They've spent years not being believed. We can be different.
Honoring their bodies. Bodies that have endured surgeries, procedures, medications, and pain deserve extra gentleness.
Celebrating this moment. For many families, this pregnancy is a miracle. We get to witness that.
Know the Signs — For Yourself and Others
If you or someone you love experiences any of these symptoms, it might be worth talking to a healthcare provider about endometriosis:
Signs That Warrant Investigation
- Period pain severe enough to miss work, school, or activities
- Pain that doesn't respond to over-the-counter pain medication
- Chronic pelvic pain outside of your period
- Pain during sex
- Pain with bowel movements or urination during your period
- Very heavy periods or bleeding between periods
- Difficulty getting pregnant after trying for a year
- Digestive issues that worsen around your period
- Extreme fatigue around menstruation
How to Advocate for Yourself
Getting a diagnosis can be frustrating. Here's how to advocate:
Track your symptoms. Keep a detailed log of when pain occurs, how severe it is (on a 1-10 scale), and how it affects your daily life. Bring this to appointments.
Be specific. "I missed 3 days of work last month due to period pain" is more concrete than "my periods hurt."
Ask directly. "Could this be endometriosis? I'd like to explore that possibility."
Request referrals. If your primary care provider isn't taking you seriously, ask for a referral to a gynecologist or endometriosis specialist.
Get a second opinion. If you're dismissed once, try another provider. It's not giving up — it's advocating for yourself.
Bring someone with you. A partner, friend, or family member can provide support and help communicate your concerns.
Diagnosis typically involves pelvic exams, ultrasound, MRI, and sometimes laparoscopic surgery to visualize the lesions directly. The path isn't always straightforward, but answers are possible.
Your pain is real. Your journey matters. You deserve support.
Apply for Doula SupportSupporting Someone with Endometriosis
If someone you love has endometriosis:
Believe them. Even if you can't see their pain, it's real. Don't question or minimize their experience.
Be patient. Chronic pain affects everything — mood, energy, ability to make plans. Flexibility is a gift.
Educate yourself. Learning about the condition shows you care and helps you understand what they're going through.
Ask what helps. Heating pads? Canceled plans? Distraction? Let them tell you what they need.
Advocate with them. Offer to come to doctor's appointments. Help them research. Be their backup voice when they're too exhausted to fight.
The Bigger Picture
Endometriosis is not just a "women's issue" to be minimized. It's a chronic disease that affects nearly 200 million people worldwide. It costs billions in healthcare expenses and lost productivity. It derails careers, relationships, and dreams of parenthood.
And yet, funding for endometriosis research is dismally low compared to other diseases of similar prevalence and impact.
This Endometriosis Awareness Month, I hope we can all commit to:
• Believing women when they say they're in pain
• Talking about endometriosis so it's not invisible
• Supporting research and advocacy organizations
• Providing compassionate, trauma-informed care to families who've walked this road
Your pain was never "just in your head." Your symptoms were never "normal." The years you spent advocating for yourself — those weren't wasted. They were acts of survival. And if you're now pregnant, or parenting, or still on that journey — you carry all of that strength with you. We see you. We believe you. We're honored to support you.
Love,
Maddy the Doula Lady 💙
Whatever road brought you here, you deserve support.
MHN welcomes all families, including those who've walked hard roads to get here.
Build Your Birth Vision
Mary's Hands Network provides free doula support to families across Louisiana.
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